Touche.

The best items of the week:

Cheneys Slam Obama for Turkey Pardon, Urge Military Tribunal for Gobbler – Satirical Political Report

Pittsburgh School District Leads Nation In Ability To Spell ‘Roethlisberger’ – Onion

President Obama Advises Troops Not to Fill Up on Turkey – Underneath Politics

26-Year-Old To See Every Asshole He Ever Went To High School With On Night Before Thanksgiving – Onion

Americans Shocked To Remember That Gay Singer Adam Lambert Is Gay – Enduring Vision

Bengals’ Uniforms No Longer Look Stupid Now That Team Is Good – Onion

I’m only objection is that there’s no bumper on which to put my Save the Whales sticker.

I only include this, because I actually witnessed this while coming home from a Wolfmother concert in SLC. Hooray, me.

The best items of the week:

Area Man Realizes He Can Just Smoke Weed Instead – Enduring Vision

Palin Accidentally Burns Her Own Book – The Skunk

Survey: Modern Women Rank ‘Having A Big Box of Random Cables’ a Must-Have in a Man – Tech Chuff

Report: Fiber Optics Not A Real Thing – The Onion

Greyhound Now Offering Direct Service From Kansas To L.A. Porn Director’s Driveway – The Onion

Area Man Passionate Defender Of What He Imagines Constitution To Be – The Onion

NSFW – Language